Copyright © 2012 Paul Ruffilio
Today’s society appears to be steadily having a damaging impact on our marriages. There are some things lot’s of folks simply take lightly. When we don’t handle these things, our marriages slowly but surely fall prey to them. What we would do here’s to bring up one such problem so that we can be aware of it.
Everyone is aware that there are challenges that face marriages. One thing that we might not like to admit is that we invite a lot of these issues on ourselves. One such issue is emotional infidelity. This is something that lot’s of us may wonder at. Lot’s of us may claim not to really understand what emotional infidelity is so we shall try to explain what it is.
Emotional infidelity is an emotional attachment with an individual other than your spouse. This is mostly driven by words. That is why you could be guilty of this without having a physical intimacy with the individual. This brings us to a major matter I want us to examine.
We would be looking at this matter from another point majorly because scarcely any of us would accept being guilty of this. I would ask certain questions. Your response to these questions would determine your guilt or not.
Do you operate a Facebook account? Apart from Facebook, are you constant on any other social media network? You now have the first set of questions. Your response to the above would likely be in the positive. Let us then go on to the next question.
How much time do you stay on these networks?
It is truly shocking to know that Facebook users spend a total of about 700 billion minutes on the network every month. This is pretty disturbing. It gets more worrisome since the study makes us realize that these minutes are minutes spent before on face to face relationship and other normal life interactions. Put this in context and you would see why it’s worrisome. Let us go on to the next question.
You spend your times on the networks with someone or some people. Who are these people?
It surely is not possible that you would be spending all that time with your spouse online. The possible exception might be those who reside in cities different from their spouses. The fact is that most of our time on the networks is spent with other people.
As if the matter of spending so much time chatting online is not enough, we now add to it video chat which really increases the chances of emotional infidelity. It is not unusual for you to find people going nude for their online acquaintance. If you as a married person engages in this with an individual other than your spouse, are you not guilty of infidelity? Since it is not physical, we name it emotional infidelity.
There actually is a lot to be done to rectify this, which work might fall to only you. If you do not wish to wait for your spouse but desire to go ahead and find out how to save your marriage alone, do the following:
– make time for your partner
– Curtail the amount of time spent on social media sites
– Carefully monitor the content of your communication on social media networks
– Be creative. Come up with ways of capturing your partner’s attention
– Your spouse has to know you are always there for them
Look at this like a war that you must win to save your marriage.